My dearest first born where do I begin? How do I say good-bye for now. Emilie I prayed so hard for you. I wanted a baby more than anything and God gave me to you. Daddy and I dedicated you to the Lord as a baby and at 8 you prayed and asked Jesus into your heart. You and Olivia were baptized together. You loved Jesus so much as a little girl. God gave you the gift of such a beautiful voice, yet you were so shy with it. You loved your horses, Flip, and showing him. You were always in charge, boy you could boss your sisters around. You were a leader my sweet girl, I don’t know what changed and when the struggles all started, it is such a blur now. You chose friends that weren’t good for you, and seemed to attract them. Then that special day we sat in Dr. Stephens office and we found out you were having Marlie, I knew life had changed forever. I had hoped that the bad days were gone and a new life of you, Marlie and Travis was going to begin. You were a mommy now. Sweet, sweet Emilie you struggled so to stay away from the drugs and what was wrong for you. Daddy and I would see glimmers of hope, you tried, I know in my heart you battled the demons so and tried. There is no more battle, there are no more demons, there is no more pain you are with your heavenly Father and until I can hold you again, all my love my dear child. – Momma